Final Goodbye
by pookakitten
Summary: A/U Shepard died in when the Collectors attacked the Normandy. 10 years later, someone visits the remains of the Normandy.


Disclaimer: Yet another story that probably won't leave my hard drive, but here's the obligatory disclaimer. I don't own Mass Effect, Bioware does.

Spoiler: First 5 minutes of Mass Effect 2 before it goes A/U where Shepard was well and truly dead.

"Final Goodbye"

Ananda's pale yellow light filtered through the snow. The lone man pulled his coat around him tightly and knelt in front of the remains of a console. The cracked pitted surface was replaced by the smoothness of memory. His gloved hand caressed the console.

"Kaitlyn. It's been 10 years. Ten years since they found your body and sent it home to Mindoir, but I find myself coming here to talk to you. I knew you best here, on the Normandy."

He rubbed his hands together for warmth before continuing. "As they did when you were alive, the Council didn't believe in the Reapers even with pieces of Sovereign strewn across the Citadel. Captain Anderson tried to convince them that Sovereign was just the vanguard, but the fools would not listen."

"I was outspoken in my views about the existence of the Reapers and got drummed out of the military with a medical discharge." He smiled wryly. "Those migraines got me that much. It was that or give one of the saviors of the Citadel a dishonorable discharge."

"After I left the military I put out feelers to find support to bring the fight to the Reapers. I couldn't have Ashley and especially you die in vain. That's the thought that got me through every day."

"Oddly enough, my biggest supporter was Captain Kirrahe. Remember him? The salarian commander at Virmire. I can remember every word of his 'We Hold the Line' speech. Over the years I've given variations of that speech too many times to count. It was one suicide mission after another."

"Well he garnered the support of the salarian STG to take down the Reapers. After seeing Sovereign change directions so quickly that it had Joker almost speechless, Kirrahe refused to believe Sovereign was just another geth ship."

"So we had the help of the Special Tasks Group, at least unofficially. Tali talked the quarian admirals around to providing some marines. Something along the lines of 'we have to clean up our mess with the geth so the Reapers can't use them.' It seemed to work. Did you know she's an admiral herself now?"

"We were a motley group. Salarians, quarians, humans, asari, a few turians. I think we even had a hanar, not that I could figure out what that one did. The volus used their control over galactic commerce to finance us. We had an unexpected ally—Cerberus. The Illusive Man thought a race of machines annihilating the galaxy was against the best interests of humanity." The man laughed. "Kaitlyn, extinction was against the best interests of every living thing."

"Our ragtag band had as its flagship another Normandy. Same stealth design. Joker was overjoyed when I offered him the pilot's chair. He told her that she was a beautiful ship, almost as beautiful as her predecessor." The man smiled sadly and continued, "She was destroyed in the last battle but she was a Normandy until the end."

He ran his gloved hands through his hair, pushing the hat off to the ground. It was dark with silver at the temples. "Kaitlyn, remember my philosophy of 'leave yourself a way out'? I had to abandon it to wipe out the Reapers. Maybe I was a bit naïve when I knew you. Everything was also so much more black and white when I was a subordinate. I did what I was told and did my best to help you."

"I did things I never thought I would when I was the one in command. I made deals with worse than Ashley's Devil. I tell myself the ends justified the means, and they did, but I have trouble looking myself in the mirror. Some days I wish I could strike my eyes out like that Greek Oedipus, but some salarian would probably come up with some sort of implant if I did. Knowing my luck it wouldn't look remotely human and I remember how much you liked my eyes." He smiled softly at the memory.

"So I did what I had to and I don't know whether you'd be proud of me or disappointed. Did I do everything possible? Could I have done something better? Did I go too far? Did I not go far enough? Kaitlyn, every day I wished I could talk to you, about what I found myself forced to do. I wish I had Ashley's faith that the ones we love watch over us in death."

"Kaitlyn, I've got to go now. My ship is waiting." He turned to put a carnation, the white petals edged in crimson, on the console before walking to his ship. He whispered to himself, "Kaitlyn, I loved you. I still love you and always will. I wished we had more time together, maybe married. I would have been so happy for you to have been Mrs. Alenko."


End file.
